This Blog Is Moving!

Hi dear friends & blog readers-

I've decided to move this blog in hopes of giving it a much needed re-organization and polish that I haven't been able to acheive here.  My other blogs will remain here on blogger.

Please visit the Grey Mists at http://greymists.wordpress.com/

Many blessings,
Aisling

Path Forging - Honoring Deity

When we make the decision to follow a specific deity or deities, there are many questions to be considered regarding our relationship with them.  One of these questions is if and how we honor deity. Organized paths often have prescribed rituals for honoring deity, but for those forging their own paths, this question must be decided as we travel along our spiritual road. 

• Is it a requirement of your path to pay honor or homage to your deity?
• If so, what form does this honoring of the gods take?
• How often should or do you pay honor?
• Are there specific days or times set aside for this?
• What is the significance or reason for paying honor to deity?
• Are offerings a part of this process? If so, what form do these offerings take?
• Are there restrictions or taboos that apply to paying homage?

 Along my own path, I find it useful in paying tribute to deity as is appropriate.  I give offerings and prayers of gratitude at the change of season to the deities that I work with regularly.  Offerings are also given at other times throughout the year, as needed.  The reason that I honor deity is to express my thanks for their influence and assistance in my life. 

Path Forging - Parting Ways with a Deity

Funnily, this wasn't a subject that I'd included in my original list of possible Path Forging topics, but this has come up in a couple places recently and seems worthy of a little time.

• What happens when your relationship with a deity is no longer beneficial or helpful?
• What circumstances would cause you to end a working relationship with a deity?
• Is it necessary to try to resolve any problems with a deity before ending your relationship?
• Are there circumstances in which one might briefly work with a deity but then initiate no further contact?
• What are the consequences of ending a working relationship with a deity on a bad note?

Ending unproductive relationships is a difficult endeavor for many people, myself included. We often will continue to cling to the relationship in hopes of savaging something of value from it. We make promises to ourselves - "I'll leave if she comes home late again" or "I'll stay until things settle down" - only to break them or make excuses to remain longer than we'd intended. We want to find something good, something worthwhile, in our relationships with others. Admitting that someone we once cared for is no longer good for us or worth our time can be a very difficult and daunting task. More so when that someone is a deity.

Celebrating the Dead

El Día de los Muertos and Samhain are quickly approaching and this is the season in which the dead are acknowledged and celebrated. Even for those whose spiritual paths do not include either holiday, this time of the year can embrace a celebration for the departed.

Some ideas for celebrating the season:

• The Memory Circle - This is a gathering of friends and family to celebrate the life of a single individual. Choose a meeting place - private is usually better, as this can be an emotional event. Within your selected space, have everyone sit in a circle. In the middle of the circle, place photos and momentos of the person. Each person at the gathering then shares a personal memory of the deceased. End with a prayer or appropriate closing remarks.
• A Dumb Supper - "Dumb" in this case means silent. A dumb supper is a feast held in silence to honor of the dead. Solemn and reverent, this can be a moving celebration. To enhance the experience, place pictures of the departed around the table, serve the dishes on black dinnerware, and dine by only candlelight.
• A Ghost at the Table - If the idea of a dumb supper seems a little intimidating or more than you're able to do, set an extra place at the table in honor of those who have departed. If you wish, speak to the departed as if they were joining you at the table- tell them the things that you wish to say and invite them to continue to be a part of your life.
• An Ancestor Shrine - Various cultures have traditions that involve the creation of a shrine to honor one's ancestors. You can do this yourself by selecting a spot to set up the altar (a small table or shelf works well). Drape with a cloth - black and white are both colors associated with the dead. Place on the altar items that remind you of your ancenstors such as photos and momentos. If you wish, you can include candles, flowers, and other decorations. Regularly spend time focusing on the shrine and the memory of your ancestors.
• Graveside Picnics - This is a variation on the idea of dining with those who have parted. It is just exactly as it sounds - a picnic held near the graves of loved ones. These gatherings are typically much lighter in mood than dumb suppers and may include libations and offerings of food left at the grave. Please, please be respectful of the rules of individual cemeteries and of other people who may be visiting the graves of their deceased.
• Memorial Tree - If you are celebrating with others or remembering a large number of people, this idea is a simple way to celebrate if you have a tree with low hanging branches on your property. To do this, you'll need ribbon, small scraps of paper that have been hole-punched and writing instruments. Have everyone write out a message or memorial to a deceased friend or loved one and then using the ribbon, tie the message to the tree. If there's a common thread such as those who have died from breast cancer, you can tailor your ribbon and paper colors to reflect this.
• Offerings for the Deceased - This can be a simple as a libation of water poured onto a grave or a stick of incense burned in memory of the deceased. In some cultures, small stones and pebbles are placed on the the grave. Other offerings can include food, sweets, alcohol, coins, and for children, small toys. Again, if leaving offerings at a grave, please be respectful of any rules or prohibitions that the cemetery may have.

These are just a few ideas. No matter how you celebrate, the important thing to remember is that the dead were valued friends and family members and even now, deserve to be treated as such.

Understanding Innocence and Experience

I'm going to step away from the Path Forging entries for a moment to talk about innocence, what it means, and what constitutes a state of innocence in a spiritual sense of the word. The description of someone as an "innocent" can be very provocative and for me personally, engenders feelings of fierce protectiveness that stems from an as of yet unknown source. It's a charged term, laden with meaning no matter what your path may be. It implies one who is ignorant of the darker side of spiritual matters and indeed of life itself.

There is an expectation that children will be to, varying degrees, spiritually innocent and without a concept of the darker shadows of their spiritual selves. As it should be. However, there comes a time for most of us when spiritual innocence no longer applies as a descriptor. There comes a time in our lives when we are exposed to and recognize the darker side of our spiritual existence. This exposure may come as a gradual, gentle understanding that all is not love, peace, and kindness... or it may come in a violent tumult in which one is forced to deal with the ugliest aspects of spiritual development without warning or assistance. How we cope with this loss of innocence affects our paths in the future and can shape not only our spiritual selves, but how we deal with our mundane lives on a daily basis.

What constitutes spiritual innocence in an adult? At what point does innocence turn into willful ignorance? Should an adult indeed even possess a state of spiritual innocence? These questions have come up recently and I've been chewing over them, trying to get a better grasp on my own feelings. As someone on a solitary, self-forged pagan path, my own state of spiritual innocence is so far removed from who I am now that it is only the vaguest of memories. Personally, I'm not mourning for it. Spiritual innocence, in my case, was a weakness, an Achilles' Heel that prevented me from understanding my own worth and value.

Understanding our own innocence or lack of thereof is a relatively simple thing, but how do we gauge the innocence of others? Two friends recently had an interesting discussion that brought up the question of spiritual innocence in the case of someone who was seeking someone to cast a spell that was decidedly dark, dark grey. One person argued that the seeker was an innocent who was not familiar with concepts like dark magic, karma, the three-fold law, etc. While it could be argued that the seeker is ignorant of the practice and ethics of magic, I have trouble thinking in terms of this person as an innocent. Being born and raised in Western culture and now an adult in a position of responsibility, I'm fairly certain that the seeker has been introduced to concepts like the golden rule, "you get what you give", and "what comes around goes around." The language and terms are not the same, but the underlying concept is the same. In this case, I'd call it willful ignorance, not innocence.

Even when we can determine the state of spiritual innocence and experience in others, the question is what do we do with that information? Is spiritual innocence something to be cherished and preserved for as long as possible? Or is it something to be quickly banished in favor of a fuller understanding of all aspects of spiritual existence? As usual, I seem to have more questions than answers when applying the idea to my own path. Such is the search for understanding...

Path Forging - Divine Work, Geas, and Taboos

In the last Path Forging post, the questions revolved around what it means to serve deity and what forms that service might take. For many of us, service to a deity means that not only are we expected to do work on their behalf, but also that we face one or more geas or taboos as we do so.

So, a few questions to ponder:

• Does deity demand that you work on their behalf? If so, what is the nature of this work?
• Does your deity have expectations of things that you will do at their request?
• Does deity impose rules, restrictions, or limitations on your behavior and actions?
• Are taboos or geas a part of your path?
• Does your deity explain the reasons for such prohibitions?
• What are the consequences of breaking one?

Although, I've posed only a few questions, my answers to them may take a little more space than usual. My patron goddess does indeed demand that I do "her work", but her work in its most basic sense involves living and acting in a way that is true to my own soul. It is her will that I make the most of the gifts that I have been given and share those gifts with others in ways that are appropriate (i.e., not harmful or destructive).

In a way, it seems quite simple. Be true to my innermost self and I can't go wrong. The problem is that being true to who I am is not always a simple matter. Like many other human beings, I don't always know or understand what it is that my soul was born to be or to do. It can be difficult to determine if what I want to do is simply a product of logical thought or something more fundamental. Part of my inner work is to figure out, with her guidance and the aid of others, what it is that my fundamental being is meant to be doing. With her help (and those guided by her), I have come to understand that my work for her is to include teaching, healing, guiding, nurturing, protecting, and stewarding. This does not mean that my vocation needs to be one of doctor, peace officer, or teacher. It simply means that I must find my own ways to do these things as a part of my day-to-day existence.

There are geas that affect what I do, but for the most part, they aren't open for public discussion (a geis about geas!). Sometimes the reasoning behind them is explained and sometimes it is not. Many take the form of "I (Herself) will allow a, b, or c... if you abide by rules x, y, and z." I am, for example, allowed to exercise whatever mediumship abilities that I may have, but there are things that I must heed in order to continue to do so: 1. This gift may not be used solely for my own profit, 2. I must help those She sends to me who need assistance in matters regarding spirits and hauntings, and 3. I cannot seek out or initiate contact with certain souls that I've known in this life. The penalty for failing to follow these rules is that I temporarily lose the ability to sense, see, and communicate with those who have passed. Yep, my life gets weirdly complicated at times. :)

Path Forging - Serving Deity

Our conversations about deity continue with this lastest Path Forging post and I'd like to shift the focus to how we may or may not serve the deities which we follow.

• Does your deity require you to serve them in some manner? If it is not demanded by your god(s), is it a requirement of your path or your own personal desire to serve deity?
• What forms does service to deity take?
• If it is not required (either by deity or your path), do you still seek ways to serve your deity?
• Does serving deity affect your day-to-day life? If so, what impact does it have?
• Does service to deity take higher priority than other types of service (e.g., to your country, to your community)?
• If you refuse to serve deity, are there consquences or penalties?
• Does service bring you closer to deity or help in spiritual development?

I will likely have more to say about my personal outlook on serving deity in the next Path Forging post, but I do serve my patron deity at her bidding and as she wills it so. My service to her takes priority over other forms of service, yet there is rarely a conflict, as it is usually her will that I serve others when my help is needed. This means that, at her bidding, I often find myself serving my community or assisting individuals.

Refusal to serve is an option open to me, but if I do so, it is with the full understanding that she will not sheild me from the consquences of any refusal that I choose to make. We aren't talking about being cast into some stygian darkness for disobediance. Rather, it is reality that she provides no small amount of protection and guidance to me and will not hesitate to remind me of what it means to stand alone without her blessing. I have, for a period, walked my path without her guidance. For me, this is not some form of hell or divine retribution, just a life made more difficult than it needs to be, an existance without the grace of divinity present.